The word ‘Trigger’ gets thrown around a lot. Probably too much if we’re being honest but when I heard there was a Kickstarter for male rompers, it triggered me. There’s no way around it. I’m personally offended. I like to think that I am at the cutting edge of fashion at some points in the Midwest, but I can’t imagine thinking a reason why male rompers are a good thing. A list of all of the reasons why they are a bad.

1. Your balls are going to look weird – No way to cut this one. Rompers will probably cause you have an extreme moose knuckle especially if you’re carrying more testes than the average male.

2. You’ve just taken away effective peeing, congrats – Dudes love to brag about how they can pee anywhere. Not with rompers. If it’s like a female one, you have to basically take the whole thing off to go pee. That’s so much more work than it should be.

3. Can’t we just like women have this one? – I can’t believe there were no takes about males trying to crash female fashion. I would have almost expected that one. Alas, we didn’t see that yet. Still, let the women have rompers. We don’t need two versions of every piece of clothing.

I might wear a lot of outrageous shit but I can promise you, I’ll never wear a male romper

Charlie.